I don’t want to open my eyes
I fear it’s all a dream
It must be my imagination
Something so great is the stuff of fairytales.

But when I feel you beside me
I know it’s not a dream
I open my eyes to find
Something so great is right here with me

I could look into your eyes forever
I could get lost in our dreams
I could open my heart to find
Something so great is the stuff of our love

In The Darkness

In the darkness
I would curl up and cry
When I wanted to die
You would make it alright

In the darkness
I never wanted to see
Then you made me believe
I was someone to be

Through the darkness came the light
You just held me burning bright
It doesn't matter where we stand
Just as long as I can hold hand

In the darkness
We were holding on so tight
Then everything burned out bright
We nearly fell into the light

In the darkness
I cried those silent tears
So you held me up for years
And I lost all my fears

Through the darkness came the light
You just held me burning bright
It doesn't matter where we stand
Just as long as I can hold hand

I would stand in the rain
Try to wash away all my pain
You were there to say
You'd never go away

When I'm hurting inside
I wanna lay down and die
You come and hold me tight
And you make it alright

Through the darkness came the light
You just held me burning bright
It doesn't matter where we stand
Just as long as I can hold hand

Through the darkness came the light
You just held me burning bright
It doesn't matter where we stand
Just as long as I can hold hand

In the Silence

In the Silence
Wrought by darkness
Came the Two in unity
Bound for all eternity

By this lake
A life to take
So perish in this cell
Future of a burdened hell

It Was My Choice

I choose to be that girl
I choose to play her part
I choose to put myself inside that world
I choose to let you break my heart

I choose to trust you
I'll accept the blame
I choose to never show what's true
I choose to let them think I'm insane

I choose to play the victim
I choose to be possessed
I choose to forget your every sin
I choose to let you up my dres

SnapShot

I saw pictures I thought were free
I never thought it'd make you bleed
When all I wanted was just to feel
I just want to be real

When you bleed, it turns me on
When you turn it is my song
Leave me hurt me make me cry
Tie me down and make me sigh

Let me be the way I like
Heart in hand, we're handling spikes
If you're here, you're who I'll use
As long as you enjoy the abuse

On the way to being true
I forgot everything I meant to do
I ended up lying to you
Consequently, leaving you
You know I never wanted to
Somehow I always do
As I forgot the way to you

On the way to going fast
I rekindled all the past
I realized it wasn't to last
Nothing in this life will last
I know below the mast
Lie remnants of my past
Which I rekindled from the last

On the way to seeing love
I lost my truest dove
I forgot to look above
To the truth and gods above
Please know what I am of
When looking to the gods above
Remember your one true love

You are my love
Pure sweet dove
An angel's eye to me
Should I open my eyes to see

You are the one
My searching's done
A heart so ever-true
With love as rare as jewels

You are my sweet
I'm now complete
I'll never leave your side
Hold tight at break of tide

In this still and silent darkness
When i'm searching for the truth
I reach out for the answer
When all I want is you

You and you, just you
My one and only true
My love, love only you

In the bright and airy morning
When I'm squinting from the sun
I look around for allies
When I know that you're the one

You and you, just you
My one and only true
My love, love only you

Wild-Eyed Wonder

At the wild-eyed wonder, I stop and stare
Such a beauty transfixed before me
With silken skin and radiant hair
A feast for all eyes is she

Don't Look Back

Tick tock, tick tock
Time goes slower, life goes faster
Speed up, slow down
Hit the breaks, turn around
You want to start over.
Try again
You can't go back, just never go back
What's done is done, through and through
You'll end up where you left
Wasted time, wasted years
Don't smile, don't drip tears
Liquid memories of the way it used to be
But, so long, all gone. You can't go back

Pirate sweetie--
Boo boo kitty fuck*
Gimme some of that
Sweet stuff, good luck

I just gotta have
That sugar high
And by-and-by
I swear I'm sighing

Just tell me now
And tell me true
How can I keep
From loving you?

*Boo Boo Kitty Fuck is property of Kevin Smith. Or rather, Jay...

My Fabulous Smile

Hey there, hey you
It's so good to see you!
I can't tell you of all the times
It was all I could do
Just to think about you...

I wanted to say,
Dedication isn't so bad,
When you've got
Such motivation
And your good intentions
Are going my way.

For the first time
In a long time
I'm truly glad
(Observe my fabulous smile)

Kicking Ass

You're passive and your sweet
Kicking ass, your on your feet
Kicking ass
Everyday in class

But will you fight for me
You know what's right for me
You didn't have to fight to get me
But will you fight to keep me

Will you kick ass,
If I'm ever harrassed?
If someone tries to steal your girl,
Will you knock them to another world? 

Good Intentions

And....

I'm dying to be with you, dying to change
Dying to realize all over again
It's the same... just the same...

I realize it's not what you wanted from me
It's hard to believe what you never could see
Every day... every day...

"In you," you say, "I know there is good.
I want you to be just how you wish you would
Be for me... you and me..."

I don't have what it takes... Dedicated motivation
These good intentions, I'll throw them all away...
When you're just out of reach, I think I can't take it
Can't you take it, just take it away...

I don't want to be the who's gonna use you
And I never wanted for you to be abused
In my bed... it's on my head...

I struggle and fight these undying desires
What more can I do when you're fueling my fire
I want you... I want you...

I give in to pleasure and release the pain
I hope to discover the good to be gained
When we are... we are...

I just want what it takes... Dedicated motivation
These good intentions, I'll try not to throw them away...
When you're just out of reach, I think I can't take it
I'll try, please don't take it away...

So Right
And it felt so right
I don't think it's wrong...
Baby, I can't wait this long...

When I see you,
Can I be with you?
Nothing but you and me around

My hand now in yours
Why'd it take this long for
Us to realize?

'Cuz you know it's right
When it can't be wrong
Whenever I am in your arms

Scared of the future
Scared of the past
Wondering if I will last

Then I look in your eyes
And all I can see
Is your emotion reviving me

And it's just so right!
To ignore it would be wrong...
I can't control what I long for...

And it's always right
You know that I'm not wrong (this time!)
Why did we wait this long...?

You Know What I Mean?
I feel like dancing up the street!
I feel like making a scene!
Let's go jump-jiving in the heat
You know what I mean?

You know what I need, baby
You know what I mean?
You know how to really turn the heat
You know what I mean?

Let's hit the drums and make a beat
Make people slip and slide and lean
Moshing heads and dancing, grooving feet
You know what I mean?

You know what I need, baby
You know what I mean?
You know how to really turn the heat
You know what I mean?

You know what I need, baby
You know what I mean?
You know how to really turn the heat
You know what I mean?

You can really hit the beat, the street
I think you're really something neat
I like you dancing in the heat
I think you're just what I need

You know what I need, baby
You know what I mean?
You know how to really turn the heat
You know what I mean?

You know what I need, baby
You know what I mean?
You know how to really turn the heat
You know what I mean?

You're just what I need, baby
You know what I mean....

Disclaimer: NOT (C) MARY VERONICA HEUSER



I Told The World I Met A Woman


I told the world I met a woman

I told the sky about her beauty,
And a thousand stars fell to earth
Since they could not compare.

I told the trees about her wit,
And ancient groves bowed in deference
To the wisdom of one so young.

I told the sea about her kindness,
And the incensed surf subsided
'Til it was smooth as a summer pond.

And to the birds I send regrets,
For having heard a voice so sweet
Their songs seemed full of sorrow.

In Your Arms
I don't know what I'm doing
Maybe I think it's all wrong
But then I see you
And it's okay
Suddenly, it's all alright

It doesn't matter if I'm not sure
It's okay if sometimes I feel lost
Because I always know where I am
When I'm in your arms

I can't tell you where we're going
And I don't know what to do
But, then I see you
As soon as I see you
Everything is alright

It doesn't matter if I'm not sure
It's okay if sometimes I feel lost
Because I always know where I am
When I'm in your arms

It's okay if I'm lost
I'll always know where I am
When I'm in your arms

Hey Jerk

Hey Jerk
Think you can write me off like that
I'll hold my head up high and walk on by
Now what'cha think about that?

Hey ass!
Think you can put me down like that
Not a chance! I've got better plans
I'm so okay with that!

Hey Jerk
You shoulda thought twice about that
I'm alright, I gotta date tonight
I hope you're down with that

Yea I'm alright, I gotta date tonight
And I'll put you outta sight

Goodbye

You led me on!
You let me believe you'd be there for me
You let me see what I wanted to see

So, goodbye goodbye
I've been waiting to say to you
Goodbye...

I saw ideas...
I saw pictures that I wish were true
I saw ideas encompassing me and you

So, goodbye goodbye
They won't be what I though
Goodbye...

I'm not gonna deal
I'm not listening to what you never had to say
I'm not listening to hear you run away

So, goodbye goodbye
I hate to make deals
Goodbye...

I'd never stay
I never wanted it so cold I couldn't bear
I never wanted you so bold you didn't care

So, goodbye goodbye
I'll go to where it's warmer
Goodbye...

It won't happen
I won't let myself in your favor be played
I won't let you lead out this way

So, goodbye, goodbye
I'll let myself out
Goodbye...

Oh, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye
How good it is...
Goodbye

Maybe

Maybe if you'd let me love you
It wouldn't be so bad.
Maybe if you'd open up again
I'd know you weren't so sad

Not Just Eye Candy

I couldn't find my way and you didn't care
I was restless and weary and wanted to share
I'd been through so much but I didn't dare
To burden you with my days of bad hair

I found my way home and gave you a call
You barely noticed I wasn't at all
Driving through the leaves in the late autumn fall
You told me to find my way back to the mall

Asumming on my shallowness, which isn't true
I was left to wait on and follow after you
You never listen, but that was something I rued
As a man, you never noticed my hints and clues

Will it be a surprise when you're alone in bed?
Will you rack your brain and examine your head?
Will you remember the times unwillingly I was lead?
I leave this poem for it's light to shed


When I couldn't find my way, you didn't care
I'll longer listening to words that aren't there
When you can't find your way back I won't be there
You can't find your way and I don't really care

Wonder
Your angel eyes, disgustingly wise
Leads the men, the guys, to sympathize
Your cause, your crew, deceptively true
The men, they rue when the discovery is new
To know your faking and everyone making
Over coals raking, in your eyes shaking
In awe and wonder, over a-sunder
Never a blunder through lightning and thunder

Two Steps Back

I can't seem to see what's going on
What's going on?
Take two steps back before you come any closer
How do I know where you leading me?
Your hand is over my eyes
Despite all my wishes I follow where it goes

My vision is hazy even when you're not near
I've lost my way I don't know how to see clear
Step back before you come to me
Step back and teach me how to see

I will never understand how to resist
How do I resist?
You're up in my face and all I can see
Your face, your lips, your mouth and tongue
I loose my mission, lost in your skin
How can I remember when
You've only taught me to forget

My days are dizzy even when you're not near
I've lost my place I can't get in the clear
Step back before you come to me
Step back and teach me how to see

Step back, baby, two steps, please
Step back before you come to me
You're closer than I thought you'd be
Step back and teach me how to see

Step back, put my mind at ease
Step back before you come to me
I'm lost, what became of me
Step back, teach me how to see

Now less than a week remaining

I've now less than a week remaining
The sunny days have ceased of raining
Even our sweet southern skies grow in cheer
With the though of you ever near
As the thoughts of you ebb and flow

Of Long Distance Lovers

Six thousand miles away, but ever close to me
Not talking for months, but together every night
In each others arms, in our hearts and in our minds
Wondering what the truth will eventually be

19, 18, 17; I count down the days
Ripping the numbers off the wall calander
Until the day you return is upon us, at hand
And with each day, I miss you more

We rush together as we fall apart
Knowing that distance has changed us
Never wanting to leave the memory
That has left with the last hint of snow

The St. Patrick's Day Parade

The other day, at the fair and parade
Something honest between us was made
I know it to be pure and true
If only I could show you...
But, the silver cloud lining
Is a truth lying
Flowering to failing
Leaving our tears trailing

Burning Hearts

Burning hearts
Smoking and steaming up
Glazing your windows shut
Prevents you from seeing the best
Lends to forgetting all the rest

Our backs to the sun

What do I want? What do I need?
Mostly where can I find it?
The summer sun tells me
Another year is past

Leaves will fall as flowers wilt
Sweet breezes now chilling
The sadest part is that
The blue skies won't last, can never last

So cold as the sun fades away
So cold, as I watch you walk away
You ride in with the flowers
And out on the tails of wind
So cold, you never wanted it
So cold

Where is my sweetness?
Where is my joy?
Girl, you always leave me with the sun
Why is my rose-tinted world dark and gray

Showing face with the summer
Then putting your back to the sun
Though my dependency is strong
The brightness in this world will never stay

So cold as the sun fades away
So cold, as I watch you walk away
You ride in with the flowers
And out on the tails of wind
So cold, you never wanted it
So cold

Girl of Summer
Dasies in her long loose hair
Daffodils in her hands
Her perfume is of wilde flowers
And sweet summer breezes
Barefoot in the fresh cut grass
Running through warm summer storms
Traipsing through the park
Her messy hair perfectly framing her face
The sun reflecting off of every ince
Of her glowing soft skin
Clean and fresh, sweet and smooth
She is the girl of summer

My Strongest Desire
Here at the train station,
Surrounded by peers.
Destination: unknown
Some are so sure
Their train will not stop,
But when forced to change cars
They may find themselves left.
Some have been waiting at the station
For months, years, decades.
Some eveuntually leave,
Realizing that to board a train
Is not in their cards.
Some, many in fact,
Will reach their destination.
My strongest desire is to find the right ticket;
The right train to the right destination.

Truth?
What is right? What is true?
It varies from person to person
Truth, some believe, is black and white
Falsehoods of ignorance! Truth is gray!
All the truths I've been used to
Are now hazily fading to gray!
I hardly know what I want any longer
What is the cost of happiness?
My two quests, side by side
Truth and happiness
While I strive to reflect and accept
The beauty within and around
Inside out, the truth is painfully sharp
And the elusive search for love
Seemingly never ending

Por Miguel

My thoughts wander almost constantly
To work, to play, to church, to Spain
You'll be home soon, and how will it be then?
Will I just prop my legs on yours
Touching your arm every time I make a point
While you gaze at me with those deep, ever-loving eyes
Can't you just feel the tension?
Sometimes I think I miss you so much
Some days I don't think of you at all
But as the day you come home grows closer
I miss you deep in my heart

Find me tangled inside your head
A messy confusion beside you in bed
Climbing and clinging to your beauty and truth
Embracing your wisdom, rejecting youth
Show me mercy! Kiss my face
Put me down, put me in my place

Was:
Find me tangled in your bed
A messy confusion inside your head

I seem to like the revision better... if you prefer the original, let me know...

Up On The Mountain

Here, so quiet. So peacefully serene
where the water runs frothy, chilly, clean
With the breezes blowing, dancing with trees
The flowers blooming adds color to green
Dressing in yellow, lavender and white
Such beauty! at this magnificent site
Here, the world is pure. So lovely and free
Might I not stay? Here I can truly be...
Soon, we shall part. I'll return to the ground
I must fine the people! Embrace their sound!
So embrace their soul, their beauty and youth
To learn from them, Learn their ways and their truths
Retaining the joy as in a fountain
The joy I first found up on the mountain.

The One
Come out and play?
We'll run away
To our hide away

Biding our time
Until you can be mine
Without crossing the line

We'll fly away far
Up to the stars
In my space age car

Gas it, baby! Gas it!
We've almost nearly passed it
Hold on and try to last it

I never want to miss you
Babe, I've just got to kiss you
And never leave this bliss you

Give me daily
It's growing stronger lately
It makes me think that maybe

You're the one worth living for
Worth dying for
And, baby, you're the one worth fighting for

Baby, you're the one.
I know it! You're the one

For Christopher

Seems you've forgotten about love
Oh, love, love, love
The truth and beauty there within
How to show you?
How to let you know, dear

You've lost the way of life
Oh, of life, life, life
The fullness to be experienced
How to bring you back?
How to let you in, dear?

Darling, we cannot forget
What was and will be
There will be no return
To the former ways
I cannot take life as it was then

Darling, know
That I have loved you
I do now love you
Darling, I will always love you

If just to be with you
To hold you and let you cry
As it never was with me
That would be enough

My love, let me show you
What I always wanted from you
The richness we lacked
Know now that I have found it
I posess the beauty!
I am within the truth!

Rush to me! Return to me
With all the eagerness
Of the rain falling to the parched earth
With all the beauty
Of the leaves as they grace the ground
With the knowledge, my dear
That I will always care for you

I don't seek your body
Or your touch of lust
I seek your mind and spirit
To fill with the passion you have lost
Or sadly, never knew

My dearest, my darling
I want the best for you
Make your decisions ever wisely

Greed

Maintaining your freedom
Respecting your life
For life, for always
Those silly law abiders...
Commend them!
Those crazy law breakers...
Amend them!

All for what? For me and you?
Nay. All this life, you know
Is driven for one reason
One purpose the same
And that reason, my dear
Is our individual gain

Truth Be Told...

Oh, Princess...
I've been dying to tell you
The truth is so cruel!
I need to be real,
But I can't see myself.

Every love I've left...
I never dreamed of letting go
Of the Shimmer after the Glow.
Staring the barrel down
Swallowing the sweet sounds
Mostly refusing to be smart

Someday When

One day, when you're not so far away
Just like when you used to say
You would always stay with me

One night, in your arms you'll hold me tight
Sleeping underneath the light
Of the big bright moon...

Only then, someday when
We'll forget times apart...
When you're in my heart

Today, promise that you're here to stay
In your arms I'll always lay
Come what may, what might...

Only then, someday when
We'll forget times apart...
When you're in my heart

written in 2001

Just knowing that I can't have you
I cry, I weep
All the plans we made
The dreams we had
It's nothing now
There's nothing left in the bed we made
The love we had
Gone
Like a flower
Blown away in the chilling autumn breeze

written in 2001

I can feel you slipping away
I can tell you don't want to stay
Both our hearts are dying
You know I feel like crying
But there's just no other way

written in 2001

Understanding

She said she could understand anybody's problems
Bullshit!
Get away from me girl
You don't know what I'm going through
You don't know what they've done to me
You have no idea how to deal with my situation
You just don't understand
Scram, slut
Find another dude, another day, another dollar
Understand his problems
Not mine

written in 2001

All I Want

I want to scream
I want to rip out your heart
I want to make you cry and night
I want to make you believe it can't get any worse
I want to break you
I want to hurt you
I want to make all my pain go away

written in 2001

Once Again

I'm stranded once again
You left me once again
I'm crying once again

I want to be where ever you are
I swear I'll go that far
Just to hear your voice
My heart leaves me no choice

I have to follow you once again
And try not to get left once again
Because I don't want to cry once again

Can't you see
I will do anything to be
Back with you once again

Collide

Tongues intwine as lips press close
Bodies heat together at hips grind tight
Minds collide when we are one

Flirting at any age

Showing off your mad soccer skillz
Thinking I'm impressed?
Well, maybe I pretend to be
Because, though I know naught of soccer
And I don't really care to know more
My act keeps your attention fixed to me

You don't know what you want

We all piled on the bed
You were tired and I was tired, but Gods!
I couldn't sleep.

Even when we had the double to ourselves,
Sleeplessness prevailed.

As we lay on our sides,
Your arm around me,
We were two spoons,
Close as could be.

I rolled over at the insistence of your hand
Caressing my skin.

You wet my lips and invaded my mouth.
I pressed my length to yours.

But in the morning,
I must wake to greet another.

I curl up beside you,
With your arm around me,
Wondering what the future could bring.

To Only Be
So, I lie here on my bed, pretending I'm creative.
Pages of prose surround me.
The room, bathed in soft candlelight.
Drunk on wine, I believe I'm beautiful.

"I'm not going to break your heart. I can't promise you that you'll never cry again. For God'sake, you're a woman!"

Jump Rope

Jump rope
But don't splash water on the windshield

Inner city seven-year-olds
With dreds and dirty shorts
Jumping rope
Through fire hydrant sprays
Twisting
Intwining
Plastic yellow handles

The Know

Smooth
Cool
Groovy
DROP!

Are you in?

FLOW!
Don't mess with it

Are you in the know?

Magnetic Poetry

Chain me fast
Watch still with
Beautiful bitter ache
As though blood is music
To love and lust

-----

Leave by day
We lose him
Leave here

-----

Eat raw & scream

-----

Worst science textbook thought

-----

Girl totally has it
Weekend looking up

-----
Big suit sister
Speak pride in music
Show blackness

Drunken Prose

Warm centers and tongues
Soft and sweet
Velvet deep

To love too much
To feel, to touch

Darling, I know I'm drunk
As we sweat in his bunk

The Cat's Meow's Songbird
Singing softly and sweetly
She loves no less than completely

Unfortunate to be directed
At such filthy swine
That sweet angel
I want to make her mine

Love, dear

Love, dear
It's the reason I'm here
The reason I feel
The reason we're real

I wanna be your sweetness
And you can be my King
If you know the right words
I'll always wear your ring

Girl to man: I've silken touch
I'll be your doll
I'll heed your call
Just, please, don't love too much

Drama Queen Entanglement with Kings of Queens

You love him, you love him
I'm your girl, too
I'm here for you

Put your arms around me
While your head lays in his lap
He brushes your face
I moisten my lips

I want you, I want you
Be my sweet dear
Your spirit here

This life is easy and gentle
For everyone but me
I dream as I watch you
You're in my arms and not his

Dear, love me; please, love me
Just stay with me
The best to be

Forever Only

Still and silent
Alone with you
Sound and sweetness
More than truth

That taste on my tongue
The thoughts in my mind
Of you, just you

Shadows creep up the walls
Darkness fills the room
I find my comfort under cover
All alone with you

Safe in your arms
Close to your chest
So warm, so soft

The fear we sweat
Our bodies glisten
Close your eyes and hesitate
Never a moment to listen

My heart on my chest
You read my mind
I'm yours, forever only yours